Celeb Cooking School

Every cooking show ever, but this time all yoofed up, and with celebrities. Channel 4's press office tells us:

Celebrity Cooking School (w/t) (8X60’) tests whether any of our celeb cooks can be turned around when schooled by one of the best in the culinary business. All that most of the celebs will know about food to start with is how to order it, but working solo and matched in pairs, an intensive cookery crash course will have them sweating it out in the kitchen, as they hilariously tackle a series of complex cooking challenges well beyond their ability – leading to chaos in the kitchen.

They’ll need to master crucial cookery techniques and gain confidence if they’re to be crowned ‘Best in Class’ at the end of the series. But if they don’t impress, they’ll get an F for Fail and leave the school for good.

Big Family Cooking Showdown judge Georgio Locatelli's in charge here; think Gino D'Acampo with Gordon Ramsay's fuse. Poppy O'Toole the Potato Queen's also there. Not a lot to say here, except a) a tolerance for strong language is a must, b) Melvin is criminally underused, and c) Giorgio's appraisals are terse, frequently to the point of impotence. (Your dish is terrible. What are you supposed to do with this information?) And you know what, we'd rather he didn't shout at students who make mistakes - of course students are going to make mistakes, if they were perfect they wouldn't need to be in school.

Returned for a second outing almost eighteen months later, by which time Poppy O'Toole was making Young Masterchef money and didn't return - and wasn't replaced. (If we're to believe the red tops... actually, we aren't, so it doesn't matter.) With Poppy entertained elsewhere, they used Melvin a bit more, and rightly so. (Electric Ray, please send your consultancy fee to the usual address.)

2022

• Kerry Katona (Atomic Kitten)
• Toby Aromolaran (Love Islander)
• Stevo the Madman (content creator, apparently)
• Sam Thompson (Pete & Sam's Reality News)
• Maeva D’Ascanio (Made in Chelsea)
• Zeze Millz (presenter)
• Laura Tott (First Dates)
• Shaun Ryder (Happy Monday)
• Paul Chowdhry (comedian)
• Kim Woodburn (How Clean is Your House)

2024

• Scott 'Scotty T' Timlin (Geordie Shore)
• Blu Hydrangea (RuPaul's Drag Race UK contestant)
• Louie Spence (Pineapple Dance Studios star)
• Spuddz (YouTube personality and The Dating Pool host)
• Ruth Codd (TikTok person)
• Nancy Dell'Olio (ex-girlfriend of Sven-Göran Eriksson)
• Ann Widdecombe (politician)
• Nadia Rose (rapper)
• Olivia Bentley (Made in Chelsea)
• James Argent (The Only Way is Essex)

There were some bloody disgraces in the first episode; one contestant thought it appropriate to serve a bowl of microwaved Rice Krispies, while another tried to oven a plastic tray.

Oh go on then. The tabloids reported that for the second series, Danniella Westbrook was scouted but was too busy, and Katie Price was supposed to do it but dropped out.

Several episodes lifted music straight out of the Great British Menu soundbed.

Channel 4 programme page

Bad Chefs, a similar show which aired around the same time.